A Well Regulated Militia

February 26, 2013 By: Juanita Jean Category: Uncategorized

Argyle, Texas is a spot in the road in North Texas with a population of about 3,200 brave souls.

And one of them slept in what the police called “a large pool of blood” and lived to tell about it.

It seems that a couple of folks in their 50’s drank enough to float the Battleship Texas one night and decided to play Quick Draw McGraw.  You know this is not going to end well, right?

At first, the 53-year-old woman told police that she had had been cleaning her .44-caliber Ruger Vaquero when she shot herself in the hand and shoulder.

The nervous boyfriend, who smelled of alcohol, told police the same story. But he later admitted that he had been responsible for the shooting.

The man said that the couple had been practicing “quick draws” on each other during a night of drinking. He insisted that he was not aware that the gun was loaded.

Now, when you’re drunk enough to go to sleep in a large pool of blood, odds are fairly decent that you’re not gonna be sober enough to come up with a good story.  And to stick to it.

We call that so drunk that you had to hold on to the grass to lean against the ground.  And if your idea of romantic is to shoot your woman and have her take blame for it, then hunka hunka burnin’ love, Honey.

Thanks to Hilary for the heads up.

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16 Comments to “A Well Regulated Militia”

  1. WakeUpAmerica says:

    ROFLMAO! You certainly know how to tell a story.

  2. Corinne Sabo says:

    Well regulated. Uh-Huh.

  3. More like well lubricated.

  4. Another Ellen in Texas says:

    Ya just can’t make this stuff up! LOL!

  5. sarahsmithintexas says:

    sounds like every ex I ever had (good thing I hate guns or I would’ve played quick-draw on their asses and I’d be serving several life sentences right about now)

  6. Brianm0122 says:

    My town! Most of us aren’t that drunk, most of the time, anyway. At least since Papi’s closed it’s doors.

  7. Lately, all these stories have been about people playing games with their guns. Since when did guns become toys? They shoot each other or shoot themselves “playing games”. So instead of pulling out some card, board, or video/online games to play with, they pull their guns out when they’re bored?!

  8. glf, playing a card, board, or video game requires having more than two brain cells that don’t have to wave to get each other’s attention. Playing with guns, on the other hand….

  9. So both the gun and the guy were loaded.

  10. They should have said they were recreating the shootout at the OK Corral.

  11. Grace Newton says:

    Did the boyfriend notice the woman was lying in a pool of blood? And Rhea? You owe me a dry-cleaning bill for my jacket which I sprayed coffee all over after reading your comment about brain cells. Of course, I do know better than to read comments here while drinking anything.

  12. Please tell me the police at least confiscated all the firearms in the house.

    Though I suspect not. They’ll call it an “accident” and no charges will be filed.

  13. Reminds me of the Simpsons episode where Homer gets a handgun (after the 3-day waiting period: Best line: Three days? But I’m mad now!) then proceeds to uses the gun for everything around the house including changing TV channels. Apparently some people think that is a good idea.

  14. I wonder, does Texas have a criminal negligence statute? If not sure does seem like they need one.

  15. The “I was cleaning my gun when it accidentally went off,” excuse gets a lot of play in North Texas.

    After his wife shot him, for messing around, a Cowtown friend explained it happened while he was cleaning his gun. While she standing over him crying, gun in hand, he asked her to call him an ambulance afraid she might respond: OK ***hole, your an ambulance (BANG)! Despite the incredulity caused by the bullet lodged in his back, no charges were filed.

    But in a murder case, after a Fort Worth resident testified that was how he accidentally his wife, the prosecutor questioned why there two bullet wounds. The grief stricken husband explained that he had immediately recognized that the unfortunate accident left the woman he loved in a vegetative state so he compassionately put her out of her misery. The jury did not buy it.

  16. Ossifer, are you inferring that I am under the affluence of incohol? I will have you know that I am not as think as you drunk I am!